Monday, July 30, 2007 ; 1:33 AMY
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For the past 5mths, i've been waiting for this day to come. It started with much anticipation and hope for this day to come sooner...to somewhat neutral n mixed feelings..to total dread in the past few days. I thought of avoiding it altogether, but having lived the past yr waiting for this day, i just couldnt avoid it without feeling that i've skipped an important chapter in my life somehow. I didnt want to regret my whole life thinking what if or what could have been. So even though i was scared n almost trembling with fear of the uncertainties ahead, i put up the bravest front i could and confronted it with all the confidance i could muster.
Ive never been so confused in my life. Never have i felt so burdened. Never ever has my heart been heavier.
More confrontations ahead..and even more important decisions to make. I also know that im alone in this..and that im the only one who can bring myself outta this mess.Maybe, what i really need is the courage to be alone again...
