Tuesday, August 08, 2006 ; 12:53 AMY
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Hmm, it has been around one yr since i started this blog and now, national day is coming again..
honestly i don't even know how old spore is. 43? Around there la i suppose.haha.
I spent the whole of yesterday packing my room again. Alone this time. You know how it's like when you open drawers that haven been opened for quite long..then you sort through them and you find little things here and there that makes up your memories...I even found things from pri sch! Letters from friends that i no longer contact..little gifts from teachers and classmates..and so many other bits n pieces that i treasure so much. These things always remind me of a time in the past when i was so young and innocent...
Of these, the one that brought me the sweetest memory was this birthday gift i got from my closest friends on my 20th birthday. A really nice box wrapped up in a pink wrapper. And inside this box, uncountable lucky stars with small notes hidden among them. I took out these notes with their birthday wishes and read them once again. Hard to describe the feelings then. I realised in the past months that i had forgotten how blessed i am to have these friends. How much time had they spent just folding those stars? And in that very moment when i carefully slid the notes back beneath the stars and close this box, i rmb that im loved.
So what if i gotta see him in school almost everyday? So what if i end up taking the same bus as him, like today? So what if he has got another girlfriend now?
Its time to close this sad chapter of my life. Just like how im packing and cleaning up my room, i gotta pack up and move on. No more waiting for him like i've been doing the past months. I think i already wasted more than enough time living in the past.
Im not saying that from now onwards, i won't ever cry coz of him anymore. Can't guarantee that. But from now on, i declare him a past memory that is permanently stored in my history folder. I have more important things that i gotta concentrate on now and dear friends that i wanna spend more time with.
Yup...so even if he turns gay one day. It wouldnt be any of my business.
